Preface: I wrote a long, other, detailed, page and a half blog post before this one. I scrapped it. So, here I am, raw and unedited, fingers upon a keyboard.
CR10—the term that brings me both equal excitement and fear. I have never been one to be too eager to hop onto study abroad opportunities. I thought my time would come, but that time was definitely not now. First hearing about CR10 on a diner date with my (then, soon-to-be) big, Cassidy Willie (CR9), I didn’t immediately show extreme eagerness to apply. Cassidy raved and raved about her “familia” and her experiences, but I just didn’t think that it was for me; I was neither ready or adequate enough for an opportunity like this.
Nevertheless, after contemplation and conversation, I applied. Shocker. In order to pacify and mollify my growing uneasiness, I thoroughly convinced myself that there was absolutely no shot that I would actually be picked to go on the trip anyway, so might as well just go for it!
Upon beginning the application, I instantly knew something was different; it felt right. Pressing the hyperlink to open a list of questions just waiting to be answered, I began the process. As I went through and began typing, my excitement only grew. Seemingly being directly related, as my word count increased, so did my eagerness. Over the course of those few weeks, my longing to be accepted skyrocketed. Beginning as a “hey, why not,” but growing into a real hope, my desiring to join CR was alive and well.
Once Winter Break ensued, I filled my time with a multitude of activities to get my mind off of the waiting. One morning, as I sat on the furry white chair in my bedroom, I naturally refreshed my email—and there it was. “Pitcock, Ronald; Honors Exploration.” Face flushing and fingers weakening I tapped the screen of my phone quicker than ever before, opening up the greatest green header I had ever seen: “Cultural Routes 10 Welcome to the Familia.”
Now, I can explain the equal excitement and fear that email brought me. Opening up that email that day brought me elation beyond belief—top five best moments of my life—yet that email also brought me extreme trepidation to now live up to the name. I am in awe that I get to continue a legacy of such honorable members of the familia and hopefully add to the legacy myself. It is time to prove myself wrong. Prove my personal labels of inadequacy, trepidation, and unworthiness wrong.
This experience has now been my own personal challenge to be all-in, alongside people who push me to be the best version of me. I still am in shock that I get this opportunity. I’m learning the deep importance of positive, genuine community (and the experience has only begun). It’s game time in my mind; it is time to prepare for the upcoming wild, crazy adventure. So here I am, game-face on, ready to do this. CR10, here we go!!!